Carlos Tevez Transfer Revisted

So, the Carlos (California Man) Tevez saga is dragging on and on. Now it seems that FIFA have been called in to moderate the situation.

We all know the end result: Tevez will join Man Utd. Joorabchian will get richer still. West Ham United will moan a lot about the whole thing. Sheffield Utd will moan a lot about West Ham United moaning a lot.

Yawn. Wake me when it's over.

It Wasn't Me, Guv...I'm An Arsenal Fan

Funniest press statement of the day comes from Boris Berezovsky, a Russian businessman alleged to be involved in Kia Joorabchian's company Media Sports Investment (MSI).

It appears that authorities in Brazil - concerned over money laundering relating to transfers by Corinthians football club, in which MSI holds a majority stake - have issued arrest warrants for Joorabchian and Berezovsky.

In a startling press statement that is sure to impress the sharpest of legal minds, Mr Berezovsky denies all the allegations, saying:

"I am not involved in money-laundering, nor have I been involved in any dealings connected to Carlos Tevez. I am an Arsenal fan."

Yup, that's right. Mr Berezovsky couldn't be involved in anything as shady as money laundering because he is an Arsenal fan.

I'm going to attempt the same strategy if I ever have problems with the police:

"Honest, guv, I couldn't have been me. I'm a Spurs fan".

I'll be very interested to see what sort of reaction I might get. I suspect, however, that it will not become a major feature in the strategies of our top defence lawyers.